January 30, 2011

Latest K Symbolic Dreams

Resident Evil Snake
I'm in the RE game, I have a handgun and surrounded by a number of snakes. Shoot them but no ammo. Get out shotgun and before me is an expanding, growing snake looks as if it will swallow me whole. I aim and shoot, it's loaded but the snake is indestructible. Not sure what to do - can't recall what happened after this - I think dream telling me to give up the fight.

Face In Pics Discussion
I'm viewing forum discussions - there is a lot of talk about pareidolia - seeing faces in objects, pictures, clouds, trees etc
There are many pictures posted and some kind of importance to this is discussed - it seems to be getting a lot of attention.


Went to bed at 8pm last night - tired, sleepy - I can feel urgent signal to get in bed.

Energies play inside - inner trembling - everything resembling K symptoms - also had major rapid heart palpitations.

As I relaxed deeply into sleep my consciousness expanded throughout the field of this material world and beyond. It is indescribable. I expanded - grown to a size where the entire Universe fits me like a glove - I am wearing it - and I found myself in everything. The worries and misery of this life dissolved in this expansion - it was lost in that vast field. Then I re-emerge, contracting shrinking consciousness fitting inside the physical body - my pillow is wet, aware of physical body, been drooling heavily and then again suddenly that same expansion, only a little larger and more vivid and then back to the body where my feet is burning and my body is lit with fever. I managed to fall asleep a few hours after the extreme heat.

Sleep interrupted every 2 hours and had many vivid dreams.

January 28, 2011

Whining Sound

I hear this whining whizzing sound coming from the sky. The birds are louder - quality of sound has become crisp. The whining sound is like an end of the world kind of alarming sound - not loud enough that it is disrupting.

It has occured since latest Salvia experiences.

Dreams of Things to Come?

These dreams have reference to my life and felt so prophetic like warning signs. In one dream my cousin's husband who in reality has a very substantially large income bracket is suddenly made redundant - she is depressed and tells me how suddenly it feels like all hell has broken loose.

In another dream - there is a woman on the floor she is paralysed possibly having a heart attack I seek help and then the feeling that one of my brother is going to pass away soon washes over me and hear my eldest sister's cries.

Then there are other snippets of dreams about my favourite tv show 'Medium' where the characters are acting out various scenes - in the dream Joe Dubois starts to have visions and precognitive dreams about his family members.

Waking up I felt the dreams giving me a message of future points and I feel completely indifferent about it - especially after what has been revealed in my recent adventure with Salvia.

January 26, 2011

Hair Raising Energy and Carpet Entities

Last night before sleep relaxed with immediate energy sensation pulling upwards from sole of feet. This energy seemed to remain mostly in the legs, it became so intense the energy made the hairs on my leg raise. Some kind of fusion where the energy wants to bleed through excess hair. It seemed to be all about the legs.

In the middle of sleep I was awoken - cannot really be sure if I was dreaming it - but the entities from the carpet moulded through their forms - I could see them without getting out of bed or lifting my head - another way of seeing? I think they want my attention on something, I feel they're trying to tell me how I can see them in motion instead of frozen but it requires something. I remember yesterday I made a statement asking how I could constantly see the changing motions of the energies that put this reality together.

I have been feeling so sleepy lately, don't know if it's simply physical exhaustion - haven't really been doing anything strenuous. Maybe a lack of nutrition, not sure but now I kind of miss the insomnia and that extra energy I had. I've read that these fluctuations of energy levels are common with Kundalini so it is more than likely to be related to the new changes.

January 25, 2011

More Fear Dreams

This was one long fear dream with different flowing scenes.

1st Scene - Tentacle Strikes
I'm in some tin made hut - there are two creatures in the same room - part human but part of face looking like some very scary creature. Suddenly a tentacle breaks through the roof grabs one creature - then another breaks through door and grabs the other only this one has a mouth and chomps down creature - swallowing whole. Reminds me of Resident Evil game. I wonder if it's coming for me and have a thought - that the tentacle is some kind of immune system fighting off the bad bacteria of wherever I was. Maybe I'm the good bacteria? at least I hoped so.

2nd Scene - Without Consent
Walk into another room - the beds are all taken over and I have only a small space left on the floor to sleep on next to a man who appears to be in a deep sleep. I get under the covers when another man who looks a bit like the other creatures tries to grab me. I kick him and scream. Wake up man next to me so that he can tell the beast that I'm sleeping here - he wards off the creature. Try to get some sleep but the man next to me has become extremely touchy. I elbow him in his chest and kick him but he pays no heed so one last time I elbow him and move away. Irritated I walk down the stairs.

3rd Scene - The Spirit Friends
I've headed for the kitchen - this is supposed to be my home but it is completely different. On the kitchen window I see a spirit becoming more visible. Some big looking child - it is an image of a child but enlarged version. I walk to it and begin to speak. My mum is calling me - I panic hoping the spirit would leave as I'm afraid she'll see me with this spirit and interpret it to mean that I am in commune with Satan or possessed (my mum is highly religious). I hear a scream coming from the other room.

4th Scene - Dance with the Snake
I walk in to the living room - there I find my youngest sister frightened half to death staring at a very long black snake. I walk to the snake and tell her not to be afraid that the snake is my friend. The snake is curled up in the corner and looks more afraid of her. Out of the blue I say 'watch this' and start to dance. I hop on the left foot and then with the right leg raised I twirl my right feet singing the chorus from salam-e-ishq song and just dancing freely. Immediately the snake is under my right leg twirling - with this leg I twirl in all kinds of ways and the snake each time copies my move. At some point I recall the snake's head is either missing or invisible. After my dance ends the snake moves towards my sister seated on the sofa who still appears to be in shock. I tell her it's okay - this snake won't bite and tell her to just play with it. She makes an excuse that she's busy with something which I could tell by the tone of her voice that's a blatant lie masked with tremendous fear.

Light Body
Woke up from the fourth scene then back to sleep - presence of entities is getting stronger. I find myself in a completely unfamiliar state not sure if I'm awake or sleeping. I sense my arms are raised and to the left, the window part a being has emerged - basically it is not a window - the window is a mask underneath that mask is some kind of being or entity (not sure about the difference). Look at my left arm it's glowing - not physical or solid - formed by light. Look at right arm - it's the physical arm but there's another layer, another arm trying to separate, this other arm is also made of light but hasn't fully been removed from the physical. With effort I try to get out with the possibility of projecting - it was requiring major force or maybe I was just trying too hard. Could not get full control and the episode ended.

Have been feeling really sleepy lately - insomnia is no longer a problem. I can go to bed without having to wait for hours to fall asleep now only even when I'm sleeping I'm not really sleeping. There still is some activity and it is very likely that is making me feel exhausted in morning - unable to get out of bed, and needing more sleep.

January 24, 2011

Fear Test

Last night before I fell asleep I asked realizing that maybe I hold some fears, and in the long run my awakening can be aided by the harmonizing of these fears I asked that my sleep process works on this.

I thought about some fears that I might still hold - and one of them I admitted more to myself than to the beings around me is the fear of loss. I chose the fear of financial loss - this is one fear I'm comfortable to work on at this point until I can identify the other fears.

The dream starts off with me in a street - I'm in a telephone booth sorting out cash in a plastic pouch - there's a lot, maybe over £1K. Someone is staring at me - he's across the street looking out from the window of a store. I read his body language - he is discussing with his friend the intention to mug me. I walk out fast increasing my pace until I am running as fast as I can. They're chasing me now. Intentions have changed - it seems another agenda they hold is rape at which point I'm sprinting for dear life.

Somehow I've gotten into a car - parked outside the house. Relieved I get in the house only moments later watching outside the window I see parking attendants (ugh! I hate parking attendants). There's two of them which makes the scene even more ugly. The parking attendants have spotted the loot - no doubt it looks much better than what they could fine me for. The worst part is I've left my purse and money bag of £1k right on the seat - and even worse is that I forgot to lock the door. I panic more coz the cash isn't even mine - my brother gave it to hold on for a while. I fear he's gonna lose his mind - this will depress the crap out of him. I can't simply stand here watching doing nothing with all these frantic scenes in my mind. Jump out window land on feet - suddenly I've become wonder woman and run after the parking attendants - I snatch the cash and purse, but still I'm not done. I need to kick some ass.

I've always known I had this major girl power in me - it was fun. I woke up relieved it was just a dream but knew that I also miserably failed the test.

The only thing this dream revealed to me was my attachment over the fear of loss. The fight symbolizes attachment - resistance to change. It revealed how I still hold on to the sense of security that money provides - and that this same security is held on to tightly by many others. In order to pass I had to let go what I was losing - the sense of security.

I have no idea what the 'rape' intention coming from the DC meant nor how it fits in with this test. Maybe revealing another fear.

A Lesson In Creation

Since my last two experiences I can see how these entities have always been around - and to think that I'm a very private person when there is no such thing as privacy. We are never alone.

This entire fabric of reality is weaved with living life essence contained within every detail - excluding nothing. We the human are like the embroidered parts - our pattern is more complex and created after nature. Even before the Earth there were other patterns - the humans arrived a bit later no doubt after much thought. Everything animate - inanimate is a vehicle - a cubicle for each entity.

These entities are everywhere that I cannot even sleep without feeling their presence - even in my dreams I'm aware of them.

I also had an interesting dream this morning where some fear that I still hold is challenged - will write this up in next post.

This morning after I woke up from fear dream - I was being taught in my sleep state (where I also felt awake within this reality - could be some kind of simulation) how to mould and reconstruct reality - which simply means a destruction of some old structures. They are helping me to direct my thoughts into thinking of the creative result and then applying myself energetically through thoughts and restructuring which is in a sense replacing something. Now I know exactly what Krishnamurti meant to die to everything and how creation is destruction - creation destroys everything in its wake. But we humans understand destruction as an end to life, an end that is a loss. A destruction that is creation itself.

January 19, 2011

Signal For Major Change

Dreams and recent experiences have been about something being taken away - the burglary incident in recent post 'Seduction' was one of the first sign I got after that some dreams have been about some part of my life where something will be in a sense robbed from me depending on whether I put up a fight - in the dreams and even latest projection I have been putting up a fight.

I can feel it - deep feelings, it probably sounds like paranoia but I just know there's gonna be a major event that will either leave me traumatised or something that will give me strength.

I know what it likely is but I'm so afraid to write it - thinking about it is hard enough. I've practiced enough LOA techniques to know that what you think about you attract to you, but this isn't even me thinking - this thought seems to be thinking by itself.

January 18, 2011

Cartoon Projection and Light Faces

At 6am relaxed, looked to the right near door, there was a face emerging. At first felt like the room was spinning, could not sense that it was astral body. Then I realized it was the 360° vision - projected into a cartoon scene aimlessly flying around viewing everything. Flowers, plants, trees - a natural scenery in cartoon. Wondering why a cartoon, just play along. I am sinking down at the same time thinking I really hate it when this occurs. Look down as I free fall - things get blurry I shout out clarity and it becomes clear. Bart Simpson is just below me, I am perplexed with his presence. I get ready in superman posture and fly up with control - just passing by this wonderful 3D canvas brimming with colour - very interesting cartoon imagery.

Suddenly I hear this loud mechanical roaring sound - like something getting scraped. I sense it's coming from physical bedroom. Something's going on there and need to get back asap. This thought brings me back - I take a deep breath and as I open my eyes to the right side there's a luminous purple light filled with beings (faces and all) with eyes staring at me - they are formed by this light. I am a little startled - just got used to seeing beings in every day objects, nature and formed by shadow and light as flat images . This was a completely different level of seeing, not just full colour but emerging out in 3D form. Took in another deep breath and looked away - I was not prepared. The light eventually faded leaving behind imprints of faces which I was more comfortable with. I could see how these visuals could make a person feel like they are crazy, especially in a society where it is accepted as a sign of mental illness. I don't believe these are simply hallucinations - there's certainly a lot more to them.

Closed eyes fell asleep with several SP episodes - in one SP I recall feeling permanently immobilized in an awkward position. There was panic, lots of anxiety over the thought that I was going to be found in this position.

January 17, 2011


I get back to bed around 6am but start relaxing fully about 40 mins later. Focusing on my breathing I am going deeper and deeper until suddenly I am touched by an idea. The idea is that there's someone outside my house - I play with the idea and find myself anxiously looking out of the top floor window - outside the living room window there are about 4 people taking a peep inside obviously planning to break in. I bang the window trying to ward them off with my presence but they can't hear me - I am so angry.

The idea slows down, and I remember it was just an idea. Then I hear whispers of voices - the idea is that they are conspiring something but I can't make out what they're saying. There is a strange feeling and the voices are gone only to be replaced by a symphony. I wonder where it is until I realize I am the symphony, I feel what is like to be a string of notes. The tune remains and there is the addition of a female voice singing at first sounding English, then Hindi at which point I'm thinking whether I am the one conjuring these songs. I try to sing along and think certain Hindi phrases, but the words that come out are different. The language has changed it sounds either Arabic or Turkish I honestly don't know. It was just beautiful.

I look to the wall on one side of the room, there's a birth of an image taking place. I stare at it with open eyes, close my eyes and the image burns through the eyelids. The base of my spine is rattling - just this tiny motion is intoxifying the body with sexual energy. I realized at this moment that all the ideas so far of this and that occuring were like caresses - a means to seduce me. I try to give into to the motion present in the spine, but with a slight movement it was gone. Got up at 7:15am.

Psychedelic Home

In this dream I'm outside in a field - again I am capturing faces everywhere. There are many people here - some kind of memorial for a well known woman who experimented with psychedelics. I feel her presence lingering in the atmosphere, I feel her say 'May all who seek peace find peace'.

I look to the left, not too far away there's a mansion. There's a huge stone structure in front of the house and this part forms a face combined with the mansion entrance. I walk closer, from the outside it is boarded up, used to belong to the woman. Walk inside, it is really massive and made completely out of stone - like one gigantic stone carved up. The ceilings are way up high and I feel dizzy just being in this big open space. I don't see any furniture about. A man walks in - some kind of presenter working for a reality tv show, he plans to stay for the week for a project journaling what it feels like to stay in a strange building.

Walk into a room with large windows - there's a balcony - this part is above sea. I see many large wild birds floating here - forming a pattern. On a wood block I see the carcass of a bird and wondered how this bird came to an end. The other birds feel something and are moving as an individual - made up of many birds.

Somehow the dream transforms where I am seeing familiar faces, kind of garbled and hard to recall. Woke up 4am.

January 15, 2011

Major Orgasmic Brain Massage

As I write this I am still feeling some brain pains.

7am tried to fall asleep again. I felt sexual energy taking over and found myself consciously moved to do the mula bandha - felt a little rattle at the base of spine and knew something was about to take place. I heard a electro button sound going 'deeeet' then another single tone.

I turn my head to the right side because for some unknown reason I can't keep my head rested on the pillow aligned with the body. On the wall I see a bearded young man, almost looks like Jesus.

Close eyes and his face is still there. Forehead gets really magnetic - brain feels like it is being pulled up and massaged - the intensity of this brain orgasm is unbearable - I know not to fight it, feels important - so I give in and remain still. My head rocks a little, nodding and shaking a little left and right.

I get a few dream visuals where the forming entities surrounding me are eating me or doing something I can't seem to describe. Got up at around 9am.

My head still hurts a lot, I feel the pain deep in the brain. Not sure if I should attribute the pain to menses or the brain activity.

Dreams of Divine Light

I had dreams about being in a scene where I am observing - making out images within the scene and capture various snapshots until it disappears - then I'd look again - great divine beings - so gigantic. They are formed by illuminations of light - the lines are made from light. They are huge structures. I figure these rays must be from the sun. The rays illuminate these divine beings - I felt they were all around me - then I got the sense that I am on top, in and around them all at the same time. This was unlike 3D, a very different kind of dimensional viewing.

This dream felt like a lesson - a lesson in seeing the bigger picture? One thing I really understood from it is that this reality we percieve has so much depth, you could get to the deepest end and still there is a lot more to see. The deeper you look the greater you see. Woke at 6am making sense of this dream and I got this inner knowing that the Earth is a tiny speck of a vast expansive field - a tiny cell on a bigger body, I felt that the deeper you travel into this depth the slower time feels - like a day there would feel like what a millenia is here. Suddenly I felt like I knew why I came here.

- at 7am fell asleep and had a major orgasmic brain massage experience.

January 14, 2011

Interpreting Natural Disasters

I have been so fascinated by all the faces that I am seeing everywhere - I mean everywhere even the smudges of a door handle.

I decided to google lots of images of various sceneries of nature etc and wow!

Decided to look up images of natural disasters. Checked out hurricanes and came across Hurricane Katrina - which absolutely fascinated me.

Here's the original image:

Source: Nasa Earth Observatory

Here's the image outlining two of the characters:

To the left is an image of a little man or a boy - to the right is a woman with an interesting permed up hairdo (the hair seems to be made of all kinds of faces). Inside the woman is a big face.

Woke up from a dream where I was higher up in the sky looking down and on Earth or some planet seeing the face of a woman - there was some message in it that I couldn't decipher - woke up at 4am from this dream with a headache and aches in left ear like I might have slept in an awkward position where my ear was bent.

I think there's another way to look at natural disasters, we should learn to interpret their meaning - maybe there's something in the bigger picture?

January 9, 2011

Extra Detoxing

Last year was all about getting healthy, shifting diet working out rather slowly but surely what fits in with me and I have made some very drastic shifts. I even made a 'New Years Resolution' brain storm which if I get the chance I'll scan and post - there is so much on the list, including things that I have already started.

This year whilst I'm still working out the diet, still needing to take bigger steps I think some detox is in order. There are so many detox, so much to choose from - I read about all the benefits and feel like doing them all one program at a time.

For the meantime what I am using are only the most simplest of methods. I am particularly drawn to ayurvedic treatments - right now I'm using oil pulling for detox and so far I have become incredibly sick from it which is apparently a 'healing crisis'. Crushing headache with intense pressures and incredibly phlegmy, also feeling sore throat coming on and oh yeah an extra bowel movement every day - not that you really wanted to know. Honestly after all the online testimonials of this very simple method I just knew it was something I needed to try out. Right now starting out with one oil pull per day but will gradually be practicing twice a day. As for the more beneficial results I will post them after a month or so. So far it's just so easy to do and I hardly notice I'm doing anything because for the 20mins that I do oil pull I keep myself busy with chores.

The jala neti is helping a lot, doing this every day until I feel the need to cut back.

Practicing 5 tibetans almost daily - sometimes I end up slacking.

Need to practice more of the Safeties - such as the recapitulation.

January 7, 2011

Light Eyes

Woke up at 2:45am, fell asleep by 6am though I was not sleepy just focused on breathing to relax, like a natural occuring meditation.

Moments later there is intense energy pumping through soles of feet, ascending through body. I could feel major expansions near reproductive organs. I could feel something like a presence near me. I'm lying down on the front side, turn my head to the right and see a beam of golden light right in front of my eyes, present maybe the entire time at the back of my head. This light is conscious and I feel it has eyes that I can't see staring back at me but can feel the stare.

I gaze into the light a moment longer and then put my head back on the pillow not daring to analyze it - I think it left me confused for some unknown reason.

January 6, 2011

More Earth Changes

These aren't predictions, more like calculations of what is likely to occur meaning the formula can change therefore changing the outcomes. So here's what I manage to get:

Lands are going to literally split, creating sections of islands*(earthquakes)
Lands will submerge under water
Major earthquakes and possibly tsunamis in places where they rarely occur (never been recorded)*
Mass reduction in population - through widespread disease*
Floods in cities

*most likely to occur this year

Every little change no matter how subtle or intense has a ripple effect, we can learn to read these ripples therefore calculate what will result from the change.

Change Is Good News

I have been very aware of global news lately, mostly what has caught my attention is the drastic changes in weather, occurrence of earthquakes and floods. It seems the Earth is peaking in its detoxification.

I think many will take on the apocalyptic view of these changes especially after the recent news of mass animal deaths - which does paint a very end of the world kind of scene. This will be the view of those who are resistant to the changes - they will carry with them in these changes a lot of fear and this fear energy will be their fuel and reflect in their individual world. Then there is another view - one that is synonymous to the purpose of the Kundalini energy in the physical human body. I do prefer the latter view but it is not a simple matter of taste, for me it is fact as I see the energy working within me paving the way for a new birth I see the likeness of it on the Earth getting ready for renewal. I'm sure there are plenty of others going through K awakening who can feel that the earth also is going through a K awakening.

The cleansing is happening in all stages - levels that are hard to understand until we view it in its entirety.

Systems will be dying off - the biggest system that has tied down mankind to slavery is going to have its own death. We know this as the monetary system. I think this is one of the feelings that I've been getting which has de-motivated my business plans - any business plan is really money oriented and mine is no different. The economy is going bust and when that happens it is no longer about 'What do I want?' but more about 'What do I need?'. Most of the essential things that we need are free - air, water and mother nature's many gifts.

This brings me back to weather - what happens to the economy of a majorly developed country when it snows for days on end, or there is a major flood? The economy slows down, profit margins become alarmingly low, and many companies end up blaming the freak weather for it. What they don't see is the written word in the changes, they don't hear the voice in the elements - Earth and its many cells are being rewritten. The outcome will be poetry of unimaginable beauty and grace.

January 4, 2011

Stuck Prana Or Something Else

Hemi-Sync Wave 2 - Intro to F12

At F12 became very conscious of the air that I was breathing in - tangible essence flowing in slowly, smoothly and deeply.

Waiting to exhale - no exhale, just inhalation with long pause and the more inhalation - I could feel an air ball in chest, pulsing. I panic. It is like a stuck feeling, a few times went deeper and got that falling feeling where the body jumps.

Maybe some of the prana met with a blockage, maybe the inhalations was drawing in prana for extreme legnths because it is working on something and I simply should not assume that something is wrong.