March 27, 2010

KFC hunger strikes

This morning dreamt that I was in the back of a van loaded with KFC meal boxes. I pig out on the fries and notice the KFC chicken pieces, I am tempted but remember the video clip I watched recently which was enough to put me off.

These food dreams are a great indication of what's going on with me right now - I rarely ever used to think about food let alone dream about it prior to changing my eating habits. Incredible how it turns out that I have an emotional attachment to food.

I can recall more dreams from this morning but they are so disturbing I don't even want to mention them here - they were sexually charged dreams. To be honest I wonder if those dreams happened the way I remember them, very odd.

March 26, 2010

Sleep Paralysis and The Vegan Dream

Early this morning at 5ish am I attempted to AP, although I was very tired. Ended up in SP where there were surges of sexual energy. I tend to be very resistant to SPs, there is often an urge to move and tried to do so and some time later snapped out but incredibly groggy went straight back to sleep and had a dream that involved a vegan.

In the dream I am in the house of a woman who is preparing food in the kitchen, we're having a friendly chat. I can't remember the conversation much just clearly asking how long she's been a vegan. That question was the most lucid part of the dream, it was triggering me to be more alert and aware.

These vegan dreams seem significant considering how I've been fluctuating between vegetarianism and veganism.

March 23, 2010

Head buzzer

At 6am I thought about APing but the prospect of getting another hour or so of sleep seemed more appropriate. Closed my eyes, relaxed easily. In this mild relaxed state there were images and sounds that when I opened my eyes to recall they seemed cryptic.

I closed eyes once again returning to that state, head started buzzing. Brain vibrating more on the left side. I was aware of drilling sounds, my teeth buzzed and chattered a little. This time I didn't focus on these sensational phenomena and just let it take its course. Ended up in different scenes with people that I know from this reality, however it was like I was meeting up with them in probable future situations.

In one scene, suddenly the head buzzing returns and I'm transported back to bed in this reality. The events don't seem worth mentioning, like in one situation my brother has a new cat who looks like the young version of his older cat. He has decided to give more importance over his new cat shunning away his older cat. I feel really bad about this. The kitties get heated up in a violent fight.

Star Gazed Dream

Last night I fell asleep staring out at a glimmering star. I wondered briefly what effect it may have on dreams.

Interestingly I ended up having quite a lot of dreams, but the one I recalled clearly was the last dream which was most lucid.

The Cake Lovers
It starts off by a woman reclining on her bed thinking deeply about something. Then a man sits beside her whom she is quite happy to see. They are both very attractive. The man leans forward to embrace her, they seem to be holding each other for the longest time while at the same moment I'm feeling bubbling emotions and I feel that this is true love.
The man brings out a scrap book, inside are spectacular looking cakes. The young lady is so delighted to see this.

The scene changes fast. There is a woman in a silver dance costume surrounded in a crowd, she seems to be deeply staring at something. I follow her gaze to a man wearing a King of playing cards costume which I figured out because he had actual playing cards of the king stuck on the sleeves. I think I was in a las vegas casino or a circus. They swiftly approached each other and I finally recognized these two as the couple from the previous scene while at the same time those bubbling emotions were present. I realize this is how and where they met.

Flash forward to another scene, I am watching news on tv and there is a commentary about a woman who creates not only the most delicious cakes but the most artistic beautiful inspiring cakes. This woman appears on the screen, she is the young lady from the previous scenes - still beautiful and youthful. She is always smiling, she reveals her latest creation, it is a gigantic cake with all kinds of art adorning it and for some weird reason it's in a bathtub. She mentions how she loves to suprise people with her creations, it brings her great joy when others are uplifted. This woman appears very famous and wealthy now. I wondered where the man is who had once embraced her so lovingly. There was no mention of him, I think perhaps that after her fame and fortune she tossed him aside. This probability began to make me feel really deeply, and I felt utterly crushed. I started hoping and praying that my assumptions were wrong. Finally the commentary reveals that the womans inspiration is her husband, who briefly appears on the screen which I am so relieved and glad to be aware of.

Just before I woke up from this dream another very interesting event took place but I will have a hard time describing it because it was something that perhaps my brain was not designed to register in ordinary senses. All I can describe is that there were light elements of different vibrant shades starting with white, flashing and bright. I got the sense that I was made of this same energy - it was an inner knowing and I was shown that each element preceded another only to unite and disperse into creation.

Woke up at 5am staring out through the window. I shall try this star gazing again.

March 22, 2010

The Essenes

I've been reading about the Essenes and their teachings and it has had a really positive enlightening effect on me. For starters it has confirmed some of my own feeling regarding my lifestyle and the importance of spirituality having a material embodiment.

March 21, 2010

Who you gonna call?

There are just too many devas, fairies, archangels, gods, goddesses and other members of the divine force that it can become very confusing exactly who to call.

Each energy has their own profession, there are some who are experts at clairvoyance ability and others who are experts in finance or prosperity.

What I have realized is that I need to get more clear about what I need assistance with and then I will know who to call.

The what is imperative.

Recent Guidance Invitations

I've been inviting ascended masters and archangels now and then, it is not something that has become a daily practice - still very new to me. As far as I have understood it, it is simply asking for divine assistance from divine energies. I think I need to read through the Self Healing Handbook because that is the book that really got me started and clarified a lot.

Last month in one session I invitied Ascended Master Kuthumi to assist with 'dedication to life purpose and focus'.

The other day in one session I invited Archangel Michael to assist with removing obstacles that stand between me and my life's path, obstacles that have started to become more apparent. I asked that this be done harmoniously, for the highest good of all.

March 20, 2010

Energy Field and Moving Limbs

Last night I woke up around 3am, there was a lot of noise which kept me up until about 6am when I began to relax in bed. I could hear the birds singing with rythmic sounds, there was an interesting pattern, they were singing a kind of verse over and over again which lulled my mind. Eventually zoned out and experienced a different kind of vibration - I'm not even sure it was vibrations.

I started to feel what I could only deem as my energy field - quite amazing. I thought I'd try to expand this field and just by sheer will it expanded acommpanying energetic sensations. I especially felt energy fizzing around my hands and I was able to condense it.

I saw that it was still partially dark in my room. Soon I was bending my legs, moving them. I didn't feel physical, more light but also partially solid which made me question whether I had shifted out of my physical body - at least before I decided to jump out the window. I was also able to still hear the birds chirping although the sound wasn't as loud, perhaps slowly fading in the background.

I thought about walking around getting used to these limbs as usually when projecting I am highly dependent on some automatic mechanism that naturally seems to control my movement perhaps causing me to become somewhat lazy. I sat up staring at my legs. It started to get even darker until surrounded by pitch black at which point I knew that I was out. I focused on my sight and willed for my sight to return which it did partially but somehow I just conked out - maybe I was trying too hard or not well rested.

This morning when my sleep was interrupted at 3am I recalled a very vivid dream related to the forest and after the projection when I tried to catch up on some sleep I dreamt a very realistic dream about a man in a hospital bed. He was leaning on his left side conversing with someone who seemed invisible to me. When he rested on his back there was a box on the left side where he had rested with blood spilled over it. This frustrated him. He leaned out to what I thought was a service button but instead grabbed a few wipes.

March 19, 2010

Kundalini update

I think the Kundalini energy continues to work throughout my sleep period, recently the jerky movements have become noticeable when falling asleep. I get the occasional tingling and moving sensation, but for the most part I feel great.

I no longer experience the teeth chattering, buzzing in the middle of sleep which is quite a relief.

One of the greatest transformation that has been taking place for a while now and continues to on a daily basis is how I percieve life. For now all I can say about that is that I feel very grounded, it feels so good to be alive.

I Want To See History

I haven't been dreaming much lately or I just cannot recall them. My sleep cycle has changed, I don't wake up as much, actually I hardly ever wake up at the middle of the night which is why I haven't been projecting.

I've made attempts to sleep earlier than usual and have found that when I listen to at least 20 minutes of someone speaking on my ipod I feel really sleepy though I do absorb the information (lately been listenin to Gregg Braden) but still I can't get enough sleep that will enable me to wake up 4am to AP. When I am successful waking up early however I have the problem of relaxing - I am either too groggy or too energized.

I can recall only two dreams from this morning, one very disturbing and the other relates to current life situation.

I woke up today some minutes before 5 am from my disturbing dream but could not stay up, incredibly sleepy and I did have intention to AP, my aim being to travel back in time to the first appearance of the river ganges in India. My interest sparked from reading a lot of vedic material and learning its history. Unfortunately I simply fell asleep, I couldn't even stay up for 5 minutes.

It is quite possible that my new diet has something to do with this, it has been over a month since I've stopped eating animal products and I think I may be needing some kind of nourishment since my appetite has been very poor lately.

March 7, 2010

Dreams of Nature

I am having a lot of nature dreams, however upon waking up in the morning I have this profound sense that I dreamt something once again about nature - it is a deep inner impression. It's like the powerful emotions are being downloaded as I wake up however there's nothing visual that I can make sense of. Very cryptic. This morning it was about trees but there was more to it than that and yesterday morning I dreamt something about seeds but my feelings tell me there was more to it than that. My brain just cannot register all the details so that I can write about it.

This has been happening to a greater degree since having the intention, since the birth of the desire to go back to my roots (truly). I'm taking all this as a sign, I have had intentions in the past few years and have had impressions of these intentions reflected in subtler ways but nothing as alive as my current desire to reconnect with nature.

March 6, 2010

Lately Dreaming

Interesting how the quality of dreams just keeps on changing. There are just too many of these to record here add to that the fact that these dreams are overwhelmingly long and highly theatrical.

Here are just the 2 I can recall at this time.

The Narrow Escape
There is a frightened frail looking old man who is narrating to me his recent encounter and escape from a murderer. It happened that he passed by a mansion, peering through the window he told me of an unusual presence he felt in this darkness. Turning away from the window and manking his way home by the light of the moon a shadow formed on the ground before him, still just a few steps away from the window. The shadow was of a man with a knife in his hand. He tells me of all the close calls he had with this murderer, telling me about how he even saw this murderer stab a few pieces of bread, compressing it all together so that he gets many breads in one biteable size. Also in another near-death moment the murderer hacks away at some brick walls, trees and plants in a pathway.

I'm quite astounded by Grandpa's account of his near, very near death experience. Suddenly the images of his story begins to flash through my mind and as if by some auto mechanism it seems that the story has some kind of pattern trying to make me alert about something vital, something that I missed. I thought it through, there were some clues in the story. Not sure what I was looking for I just continued to think it through as if life depended on it. The story was told with such great clarity but even more so it seemed how each moment, every incident of the tale was continued always by a narrow escape from the murderer.

At the final moment a question came to mind - how did this frail old man manage to escape from a seemingly super strong murderer and how does he know so much about this murderer? Standing before me was no longer a frail old man, but someone who liked to address himself in third person. I took a step back ready to scream at any moment, however at the moment that fear begins to take a hold of me I wake up to the physical very early at 3am with the bright moon radiating light through the window.

Singing a Song of King and Queen
In the physical reality I have a cousin with whom I'm not so close with but for some odd reason I have quite a lot of dreams about her, interesting dreams and these dreams are often related to things that are occuring in the physical reality. In a past dream just a few weeks ago I dreamt that we were outside in the middle of nowhere. She's lying down on her back resting on some kind of tomb and I am sitting by her side. She's pregnant (as is the case in the physical). There are people about but my focus is solely on my cousin. I place my hand on her belly and before me appears a young man, he has on a sweater with geometric patterns and many colours. I look to the other side and see a woman about the same age as the young man interestingly enough with the same sweater. I got the profound sense that these two were meant for each other.

In the physical reality a day or so after this dream I got the news from my sister that my cousin was bedridden in hospital bleeding excessively and then some more days later she gave birth to a boy via c-section. I haven't since made any effort to go visit them. In a recent dream, just a few days ago I dreamt that I was in her living room. She is holding her son who is looking at me, I cradle him in my arms sitting on the sofa. He is of course adorable. Suddenly I break out into a song, my voice gentle and rhythmic. I sing the song 'Raja Ko Rani Se' from the movie 'Akele Hum Akele Tum'. It's a movie I watched over a decade ago, one that made me cry like no movie ever would after it not even Titanic, I think I was about 11 or 12 at that time. For further interest here's the translation of the lyrics Raja Ko Rani Se.

March 2, 2010

Overcrowded and The Request

Past two days I have woken up earlier than usual. Each time I woke up staring out the window with the moon as bright as ever in the same exact position.

Last night I woke up at 3am and attempted AP at 6am which I haven't been able to do recently even though I have had plenty of opportunities. It has been difficult relaxing or even going back to sleep in those early hours since I wake up fully.

This morning I managed to relax a little, however there was an endless mental chatter about random stuff I can't recall. It was dark and suddenly a genderless voice in my right ear began to speak. "Tell us what you believe in. We will wait for you..." I thought that was an unusual request but began to ponder my beliefs. After a series of uh's, umm's and a aha I said as though I found the right answer "I believe in good kind people". As I waited for a response I was perplexed by what was implied by 'believe', maybe the request could've been a bit more specific and a hmm later I really wasn't sure what I believed in.

Then I felt myself moving in a downards motion and had a feeling that I was going to have a clearer connection with the person / being who spoke to me. I started feeling nervous which didn't last long as an uncomfortable sensation was induced in my right ear - it felt like it was about to ring and I braced myself.

Soon I began floating in a beautiful natural surrounding, I focused in on a tree that had fruits I could not recognise. On this tree there was an abundance of long leaves. It was comforting to be passing by here. I continued to float by and went up higher, passed by a busy city with tall corporate and apartment buildings. There was a highstreet with big neon logos - similar to McDonalds, KFC only much bigger and had a clubbing scene feel to it.

I noticed tall buildings with flat roofs and people occupying the top parts - there were a lot of people scattered everywhere. I continued passing by until surrounded by darkness where my right ear once again had that uncomfortable sensation. I knew that reality was once again about to shift and I had to just hold on. End of recall, woke up at about 8am.