October 26, 2010


Woke up at 2am, by 3:30am I thought about using this opportunity to AP - felt in the mood and was able to stay up longer than usual.

As I got prepared I wondered if I should try to keep my options open - this time I invited those Forces who are invisible to the human eye to assist me. I asked if they could open up my perception so that I could see them more clearly at all times, if they can help fine tune me and that I will remain open in how that will be done and not impose methods that I think will work. I asked that only Forces of the Divine come to assist me for Divine Purposes.

I breathed deeply a few times into my abdomen and then relaxed. There was some movement at base of spine and some tingle in leg. Focused on my breathing but noticed how my attention would wander off. Turned from my back to rest on my front side and felt more comfortable and started dozing off. I became aware of a few dreams starting to play out - one sexual, the others about random stuff. Suddenly my awareness is alerted back to physical, my ear began to vibrate rapidly (can't recall which one). Then the top of my head vibrated, I could feel the movements of my brain just buzzing rapidly without pause. I relax and the spinning occurs.

It is exactly as though spinning on a disc, my body spread out like Vitruvian Man. The spinning is just as fast as the vibrations. Spinning, spinning - next to the window now. I look at the bed as my body flying backwards - physical body absent.

I'm still spinning but in slow motion - on the corner of my room near the window I see two small rings of light. Spinning around I am positioned to the other side of the room still can sense where the window is I am sinking down, I could reach out towards the window, I could fly I could take control but I'd rather not. I want to experience and let those forces map this journey out without me interfering. I give in to the sinking but then something flashes near the window - it's scrambling and I naturally float towards it. I am in the sky and the light is etched into black writing. I see the letters and at first read 'freight', then I figure it says 'preach' until I read it backwards - very clearly I'm reading the word 'teach'.

I don't know what to make of this except a few knowings that were triggered. I end up grounded inside a female physical body. There is a man next to me with a few women - these I recognize to be friends of the woman who's body I have occupied. There is another man in front of me who seems to be interrogating us or possibly just making conversation. He is asking for my name - I know my name but know it's not hers, so I turn to my male friend and say 'My friend here will introduce us.' He calls me Kat, I sense it is spelt with K. I affirm. I'm not conversing much, I look around just taking in the scenery. I am in a place of limited buildings, mostly just a field but like a big garden loaded with people and a few pathways. I then focus on the man who was asking for my name and noticed his boobs. I thought he was a man, suddenly I press one of his breast and say 'You're not a man' - LOL, I'm not sure what possessed me to do that.

I don't recall much after that, except I found myself returning gently repositioned. There was a few Kundalini activity, spasm in right leg and a few passing tingles. It has been such a long time since I APed, glad to know I still can do it and the quality has somewhat changed. One significant difference is the brain charge - it is possible that some part of my brain is activated to allow smoother transition. I'll have to AP a few more times to observe this.

What was the message in the word 'teach'? When I read the word it did trigger some knowings in me. Somehow 'teaching' is my assignment, but teaching what, who and how was not very clear.

October 25, 2010

Heads or Tails?


I'm in the garden, I see a headless cat (white with light brown patches) - no blood just the neck part covered with fur. I'm not as scared as I should be just a little creeped out but more curious. I'm wondering why the head is missing - what does it mean? I think maybe the head is there but I just can't see it so I call to the cat to see if it could sense me. Another cat shows up - this cat is missing its tail and part of its behind. Now I'm even more baffled but my thoughts lead me to thinking it is some kind of puzzle - perhaps the missing head part is to be connected to the missing tails part. I know that would look very weird.

As I walk into the kitchen I could sense my neice and nephew in the garden - they are playing aggressively with the cats. I get images and thoughts of what happens when people are violent with cats and know that these cats will not hesitate to attack them in defense and try to stop this from happening. End

Also dreamt about shopping in a clothing store and a kid rummaging through my handbag stealing some games that I don't own in reality - right in front of me. I remember I keep telling this kid to stop going through my bag until I crack and start yelling.

October 12, 2010

Starling Totem

A starling in my garden just hanging out on the fence. It's amazing to suddenly get a visual of a bird for the first time.

Starling teaches lessons of group ettiquete, social standing, family relations and how you appear to the world in those relationships.

October 8, 2010

The Boat Ride

My consciousness is in the sky, I'm swooshing down - I feel like I'm moving like the wind. As I move towards the landscape a very beautiful Mediterranean island comes into focus. There is a young woman coming out of a building that looks very well suited for the natural scenery.

Somehow I know this is her parents house and I begin to wonder what she has planned for the future. She is smiling a lot and seems too happy. A young man comes into view, he holds her hands and leads the way to his boat. The man is completely smitten by his lady friend and does not take his gaze away from her. I soon start to feel the way he must be feeling and then I'm feeling the way the woman is feeling.

Suddenly I can feel the sea and I can sense danger lurking about, there is a big rock that they're about to crash in. I then become the warning signal to which the man responds and swiftly swerves his boat sighing with relief that I am able to feel myself. I then start to sense the woman's reaction. She is feeling guilty of allowing her partner to give his complete attention to her. She watches the way he maneuvers the boat and I feel at this point that somehow I'm inside her mind and while I'm there my thought is perhaps I can learn how to ride a boat as it looked so easy. It was like I was implanting this thought inside her head.

This dream is so much different than the usual dreams and much more colourful than I've painted here. It was amazing to sense emotions of the dream characters and at the same time experiencing myself as the element of water and the surrounding atmosphere. It was like I could switch angles at any moment. If I had more control of my dreams it could be even more fun. I think this dream is asking me to learn to maneuver the dream. The boat is symbolical for the 'dream body', the sea is the 'dream' and the young woman represents the 'dreamer'.

Lucid dreaming requires a level of consistency which is the case for any ability we may wish to adopt. I found astral projecting a lot easier maybe because I felt more inspired to project than LD.

October 6, 2010

Ausome Water - Deeper Healing

This time I used 10 drops of ausome in 16oz filtered water. Sipped a bit, no immediate effect. Slowly sipped 8oz of the water and felt like taking a nap. Prior to this I made a wheat milk because my wheat sprouts came out too long and disgustingly sweet - flavoured it and mixed water then took a few sips and after that I was feeling nauseous.

When sipping the ausome I was waiting to throw up - decided to take a nap to help me forget that sick taste left in my mouth.

During the nap I felt pulsing surges in my hands and legs - there was definitely deeper work being done. I flinched several times during the pulses of energy surging. After an hour of napping I felt great - the sick taste was almost completely gone.

October 4, 2010

The Light and Arabic Songs

I woke up at 4am from a dream where I'm in a public toilet and a man is peeping through some gap and toilet paper is made of plastic and dipped in water. I yell at the man which wakes me up.

I couldn't sleep until 6am, closed my eyes and my awareness changed when I opened them again. There were furniture where they did not belong. Suffering from some memory loss I was trying to remember what my room looked like. I could feel something was very different. I close my eyes and a few minutes later I felt a presence so I opened them again. There was a spark of white light to my left. I moved only my eyes to get a look at it - the light stretched out into a ribbon in front of me, as this occurred the brightness intensified. Then it swooshed up near the top of my head where I felt a presence lurking. Rolled my eyes up to see it but didn't get very far because my brain was being surged with some electric currents.

Suddenly I hear an Arabic song being played with the word 'Allahu' being repeated and then another song with the word 'Habibi' being repeated. I can't recall if the voice was feminine or masculine, maybe because I just couldn't tell since there was no indication of any gender. The songs were beautifully sung and mesmerising.

I know Allahu is derived from word 'Allah' which is basically the Islamic version of 'God'. When I thought what 'Habibi' might mean the word 'Beloved' came to mind. I knew that the songs were trying to clue me in about what was happening but what I couldn't understand is the Arabic format. I do have some background in the Arabic language since my mum tried to raise me as a muslim (which did not work out the way she expected). For a good part of my youth I had to learn this language - the way I was taught was very absurd. I learnt how to connect the letters and read arabic words but was not taught the meaning of the words so I ended up reading dead empty words.

After this incident with the light I slipped into a dream state where I'm looking in the mirror with an array of spots on my forehead - I know this is a sign that I'm detoxing. Then I look at my left eye, there is a big sore red spot on the white part that scares me so much that I actually book an appointment to see the doc - something I haven't done in several years.
I end up in the hospital, there's a female doctor she prescribes me something for the eyes. I get the medicine but decide to leave it as a backup and see if the spot goes away without it. A few days pass by and it's cured I go tell the doctor about this - she tells me 'still, it could be infected' but I don't buy it and happily walk away.

I should note here last night I prayed as I fell asleep, something I do randomly - I felt a really deep emptiness and I asked God if it were possible to fall asleep and never have to wake up again.

October 1, 2010

Ausome Water Review

The ausome water arrived today. I got excited when unpacking, I guess because I've been waiting for this for 2 weeks. In 16oz filtered water I used 5 drops of ausome water and sipped a glass of it - did not feel anything. Maybe I need to drink it slowly. Added two more drops. There were tiny tingles here and there but that is something that I've gotten used to so I'm not sure if it was the ausome.

After about 30 minutes I noticed my surrounding was inflating just a slight bit. Then nothing really - I think it might be that I was either expecting too much from it or simply did not know what to expect.

I do think maybe the reason why I did not notice any particular change was simply because I had a big feast for lunch or it could be that it is working on some deeper level. Perhaps this will work better on an empty stomach. Also I used only 5 drops in the 16oz water as written on the bottle whereas on the site the recommendation for beginners is 10 drops.

There is something I should mention, since drinking this water I've been peeing a lot - I have read about another user having had this same effect. Now I generally need to make many trips to the bathroom since I drink a lot of water but this time it was so much more within short gaps of time. Also the colour of my urine was very clear each time which is not common for me until later in the evening.

I did pray before consuming the water for effective healing - I realize now after trying this why I felt the impulsion to get it in the first place and the main factor is healing - the healing of the physical, psychic, emotional, spiritual, mental and subtle bodies.