December 24, 2011

A Face In The Universe

Woke 5 or 6 am - doing UT again.

Too much energy - tried relaxing. By 8am doze off - no recall of transitional phase.

Zoomed out somewhere beyond space feels like I am veiwing the universe - changing faces made of stars and then atmosphere and various colors - something being told - revealed yet to recall.

When I first saw a face formed by lines connected or emanating from a collection of stars I instinctively looked away - too intense. Then looking back the colored spaces for one large face.

Other things took place - FAs and scenes I cannot recall since I'm writing this too late - all events are quickly fading. I awoke around 10am - rarely sleep till this time.

December 21, 2011

The DreamWeaver

This morning at 5am I was as usual having difficulty falling back to sleep - mind rampant with thoughts. Eventually relaxed which entails resting on my front side but still took effort getting comfortable. I could just get up and forget attempting to sleep next time but as the weather is so cold now I get a little lazy in the morning.

Maybe a few minutes or so after I relaxed entered the projection transitional state - there was residue of ear ringing sensations in right ear. This has not occurred in a long time and now that the sensation is back I was concerned because this is the same side where the lump developed.

Brain buzzing as the lucidity of my new or converted environment enhanced. Before I emerged into the new scenes fully there were voices and it seemed these were actual events - some that have happened and some that may happen. Some future 'I' was speaking to a woman regarding a bill - the scene which I didn't see with my eyes but rather felt it occurring was me on the telephone listening to a woman who seems familiar telling me something about £90,000. Don't worry about it too much, hasn't happened yet. Then I hear my niece speaking to my sister - she's staying over for the holidays - I felt I was listening to a conversation they had the previous night but no actual details to verify since everything was moving with speed. This initial stage was choppy, there were so many sounds and other voices.

There were patterns, strange looking objects in the sky - the lens were constantly changing. Again that curiosity - open eyes to check on physical environment. Brain starts to buzz more, eyes in a kind of locked position feeling like again I'm having to pry it open. I get this sense that in this state if I don't keep my eyes closed away from physical environment I have the potential to cause some physical damage. The physical environment objects were bulgy or it appeared so. Close eyes - go through the motions of the other environments playing out. Some moments there was this undeniable knowing that I was the one who was changing the environment - the patterns and visible objects were my own doing. Some part of me was creating each and every aspect of this other reality - the knowing wasn't static - some moments I grasp and know fully and then suddenly I am in awe at changing environment losing myself within it forgetting that I am the mastermind behind it.

Head starts to buzz as I move away from foreign scenes and enter several false awakenings. There is external physical distraction as I am in the last FA where I can't move my limbs. This slowly brings me back to physical reality but head and brain hurts so much. I force my eyes open in a state of grogginess - I simply want to fall asleep but have to get up. Even as I write this energy levels feel so depleted - this mornings event has caused major fatigue which I hope a quick nap might fix.

December 8, 2011

In Between 2 States

I slept last night feeling devotional which comes with a package of emotions that are uplifting. Sleep was interrupted twice - once at 2am and the other at 4am. It was during the latter I was so fidgety and could not sleep nor did I want to bother getting up - I think now I may have been a little dehydrated and should've drank some water.

I think around 7am I relaxed, focused on the breathing and forehead area. I was expecting something similar to what I experienced in 'The Wise'. It is really the most lucid and solid visual I've had of the others and I felt this way I could communicate more directly.

Instead I ended up at my secondary school. I recently had an opportunity to revisit this school in reality. In this vision I entered the buildings, going from classroom to classroom wondering if I am really there or it was all just in my mind to begin with. I knew as I moved about and explored that my body was in bed and I got curious. Opened eyes and moved a little - a huge mistake. I felt something pried into the brain and movement caused an incredible amount of pain. Knowing I have to remain absolutely still I closed eyes and once again entered the school visual - some brain activity - a surgical procedure being carried out in the brain and I felt that in last nights salvia session.

December 2, 2011

The Trees Are Breathing

Staring out window at the waxing crescent moon - the clouds around it clearly forming. I just suddenly felt like looking out the window to stare at the night sky for a while. Glanced at the tree beneath it across the garden, briefly staring there was a feeling that the brain was operating different to usual in this quiet serene state. The numerous branches pulsing and waving in and out - the entire tree seemed to be breathing. Then when I observed the many faces formed by the branches and whatever leaves remained the heads would look to be bopping.

Like changing lenses - one lens showed the entire tree as a living breathing being and another lens revealed the many countless faces of other beings - it seems like an infinite number of beings can and do exist within this one tree. That entire tree as it pulsed in that energetic wave took my breath away. Interestingly I was able to remove focus from this kind of viewing and deliberately return to it merely by being still and quiet within.