Last night, before sleeping practiced diaphragmatic breathing for a few minutes. When I stopped controlling the breath I got ready for some sleep. Eyes closed, replacing the darkness behind the lids I could see an orange glow covering the entire field of vision. At first it was a deep orange and suddenly it got lighter and brighter. It looked like how the back of the eyelids would appear orange in front of the sun only the brightness of the sun is endlessly increasing to such an intensity it would cause blindness.
It happened in an instant - it was fear that snapped my eyes open. I seriously began wondering whether I can go through with any of this because of this level of fear that comes with every new special effect. Or maybe that's the point - to face these fears.
December 11, 2009
Inner View of the Sun
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3 comments:
I am curious to know whether or not you are experiencing different level of fears? I would have presumed that once one conquered the fear of astral projecting then the world...no...existence, actually, would be the limit. I only popped-out once and I felt as though I was a wave of energy floating next to my wife; I became afraid and snapped back into my body. It would seem that I am not afraid to attempt to project during the day, but at night is a different story. How did you overcome your initial fear - that is, if you had any fear at all? Presumably, once you overcame this initial fear, are there different levels of fear beyond the beginner's fear? It sounds like it based upon this posting...
Initially I had no fear about astral projecting. I was somewhat skeptical, but the prospect of travelling outside my body, beyond galaxies and not limited to the physical realm was enticing.
When I projected for the first time I got a taste of what it was like to be seriously afraid. This fear is deeply rooted in the fear of the unknown. At the time I thought I was in the process of dying - I had no idea I was even projecting, it was too real.
As far as I know first experiences usually have some fear attached to them.
Once I realized it was a projection, fear was naturally replaced by excitement and for a while I projected without fear.
Evidently, there are different levels of fear beyond the beginner's fear.
The fear I am now experiencing is because the strange things which to me are acceptable or manageable while in the astral state are now occuring when I'm still physically focused and I get this sense that I am no longer in control.
At the same time I understand that fear is limiting. This fact not only applies in the astral but also in the physical.
Greetings,
Thank you very much for your response. I love reading your journal! Keep up the great writing...
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