Abundance of Synchronicities and Lessons

I have had a lot of synchronicities, even prior to the K event. They continue to expand and at times I'm just not sure what to make of them. They happen in so many ways under all kinds of circumstances with a variety of factors.

I can't recall that many simply because there are just too many of these Synchros. One that I do recall though, happened a few days ago. I was talking to my sister just before watching 12:01 movie about how the movies in the 80's and the 90's were so much more fun to watch then the ones released nowadays. I was talking about 'The Goonies' which was one of my fave movie of the 80's and how I so loved watching that. A few hours later I switch the telly on and guess what movie they were broadcasting? Yes, 'The Goonies'.

I told my sister about this and her response was 'Wow I love it when stuff like that happens'. This happens to her too, it happens to everyone but the majority would either think 'Wow' and leave it at that or they would leave it down to 'coincidence' which if you ask me sucks the fun out of everything.

Yesterday on the bus a disabled person who seemed to have mental health problems sat next to me, with his carer moving his big walking aide to one side. I didn't realize at first that he was mentally imbalanced until he wouldn't stop staring into my face with a big Sloth like grin. I suddenly realized he looked like he could be Sloth's brother from 'The Goonies'. I have to admit I did perhaps what anyone would do, I panicked. Didn't want to get off the seat coz I know how impolite that would appear. He tried to talk but his words weren't really words. I held on to my breath, and then had a thought 'Wait a minute, this guy is probably the most harmless person on this bus right now. He has such a big genuine smile, my fear of him is completely irrational.' With that my fear dissolved. I have learnt that fear is always irrational and that its common theme is fear of the unknown - we fear that which we do not know.

Surely these synchros are meaningful to the individual who is having them and only they can identify what it means or the message it holds. I personally do feel there are messages in them. Michael Sharp advocates that these synchros are messages, a form of communication from our spirit guide network. Another is intuition which is a more advanced, more reliable form of communication one that has also heightened for me.

Brain Orgasm

My head was hurting so much yesterday. My right eye and the bone surrounding this area was very painful and I was in the crankiest of mood, easily irritable. I went to sleep early just a little after 9pm listening to Chrism on mp3 player - I don't recall feeling sleepy at all and can't remember how I fell asleep.

I woke up at 12:27am with my mp3 player switched off. I was confused coz I couldn't recall switching it off - it does not switch off by itself unless the entire album is finished. After midnight meal (hungry for emotional reasons I guess) I listened to some more of Chrisms Kundalini dialogues on mp3 player. I don't know if it's his voice or energy but I get this amazing harmonic and peaceful feeling when I listen to his voice, it's like all is well.

Went back to bed after 1am listening to the rest of Chrisms dialogues. Suddenly felt near the right eye where I was feeling pain something smoothing out travelling to the center of my brain. Wave like but distinctive from that, and with that was this near intolerable orgasmic feeling in my brain. I of course liked the sensation and wanted to let it play out. Took my earphones out and did just that but it soon faded - the pain and tension that I was feeling prior to it also faded. I do recall having this brain orgasm once before, this one just felt like a step up.

I think many kundalites who have experienced this describe it as 'blissful sensation in crown area'. The sensation was indeed blissful but at the same time I thought it was taking me up and out of my mind in some ways.

AP Intention Failure

I did try to AP - however I'm just so occupied with so much crap. I just can't seem to relax at all. Neither mentally nor physically.

I've been listening to a lot of advice from Chrism about Kundalini and that is about the only thing calming me right now - I want to start practicing some of what he suggests. I have tried to stick to the safeties before but always found myself forgeting about it, mostly coz of so much other nonsense going on in my life.

Things are clearer and I know where the disruption is but... I feel so utterly and miserably alone in my current circumstances. I wonder nearly all the time that no matter what I do - what is the point? with the few exceptions where I try to hang on to this existence by finding a distraction.

I'm so jumbled up right now I can barely articulate how I really feel.

Intentions For AP

Past few days I have been waking up at the perfect time to attempt AP just after 4 am. I have felt like I could stay awake as there is an alertness but for some reason I would somehow end up just falling asleep without giving a single thought to APing - it doesn't even cross my mind.

I don't exactly go back to sleep, it's more like I just black out. At the same time my dreams are more vivid and some progress in recalling them.

Going to bed now and should I wake up my intention is to AP - I will be using the method of pulling energy to third eye region. Now the trick is to keep reminding myself that my intention is to AP before I black out.

Surrendering and Fasting for Kundalini Progress

Fasting
I have read here that during a certain phase of the Kundalini process there is a need to fast or eat little. I've been doing the complete opposite of eating a little, in fact I've been eating a lot plus lost certain amount of weight which continues to worry me. I think my increase in food intake is due to my concern over the fact that I never get hungry, maybe just once a day and I get full after a small snack. The weight loss could be due to eating low fat and good fat food.

I am obssessing over food in the hope that I get hungry again, one thing I've learnt so clearly though is that my previous hunger for food was to fill up some emotional gap. Now I'm better able to discern what is good for my body and what is bad and taking the initiative to incorporate the good - I guess the only thing that bothers me is the absence of my hunger signals - perhaps it is time to listen to my body more clearly in different ways.

Is this due to the Kundalini - I can't really say though this change in lack of desire for food came since the K progressed. I will be fasting soon but for now I'm going to eat small meals (snacks), watch my energy level. I will be consuming blackstrap molasses and taking a supplement.

I am not really concerned about energy levels, since it has been pretty high. Haven't needed much sleep and when I wake up most of the mornings it's like I never really went to sleep.
Surrendering
Another thing I've realized is that I haven't been surrendering to this K energy. I've been so wrapped up in other developments that I have forgotten I ever had a K awakening. Though I'm still getting signs that it's still there it appears to have slowed, calmed down except for when I relax or sometimes just before sleep. For the most part I haven't been able to relax let alone meditate, I can feel the tension even right stored in upper regions of my body particularly chest (deep breathing is not helping), there is some tremendous tension built up in my head and thoughts are rampant at this stage. I do wonder how is one to surrender when they can't even relax. Perhaps this entire build up of tension is building up because this K energy is trying to break through some blockages.

A few days ago in the afternoon I suddenly felt really sleepy and decided to take a nap. In order to shut my mind I kept repeating how tired and sleepy I was feeling and that I just want to let go of everything. This tired feeling was not physical but a mental exhaustion. My mind cleared, I thought 'yay, I'm gonna sleep now'. In the short few minutes that followed my arms jerked up followed with my entire body and awakening me - about 5 or 10 mins later opened my eyes and just could not believe how suddenly awake I was feeling. One minute your so drowsy, sleepy and the next you are more awake then you've ever been. This could also explain why I'm not needing as much sleep as before which was 7-8 hours now I think I could survive on 4 or 5 hours of sleep. I like the idea of not needing much sleep.

Thinking about Fasting

I will be starting a fast soon, in fact there are few cleansing body detoxing systems I've been looking at. However, for now I'm trying to balance my nutrition intake - which I need to do through my eating habits. Let me tell you, it is pretty hard and in the beginning I tried to rush in completely with a high raw vegan diet because the inspiritation was very high at the time. Now, I think there is this importance to taking small baby steps - my baby steps have been pretty big however I'm taking a few steps back from the vegan route to the vegetarian route.
I seem to have an addiction to cheese.

I think the best thing I could do now is understand my cravings which is something that I've been doing and I've come up with an easy solution. As an example when I tried to understand my craving for fatty food I did research on fats and it's importance and discovered that there are good fats and bad fats - I then started to incorporate a lot of good fats (avocados, nuts, seeds, olive oil) and minimized my bad fat intake (in my case fried food and animal fat). So I found a good replacement for fats. However I think I understand my addiction to cheese having to do with taste rather than it's contents and this is something I'll resolve over time.

Fasting Dream

This morning I had those type of vivid dream that while you're dreaming it's all very real, happening but hard to recall once awake.

What I could retrieve from today's dream is about my recent order for blackstrap molasses to help with my calcium, iron and other essential mineral intake. In the dream I am consuming the molasses, then there is an alert message about fasting. It keeps playing over in my head that I need to fast, I feel like I'm the one who is thinking this thought but it is coming from somewhere else. I wake up and I'm thinking - 'That's it, I need to fast. I need to remember this. I will fast.'

I wake up knowing that I had to fast.