October 26, 2012

The Death Chronicle

For the next Salvia session I plan to fast for a week. Fasting for a week without food and only liquids will be quite a mission but I intend to do it, besides it frees me from the burden of having to prep meals everyday and I think I seriously need a detox especially after the damage I've caused today. I might do a papaya cleanse.

Anyways the point is the clearer the 'passageways' are within the physical body the easier the Salvia ride. I have noticed my earlier Salvia session were far more interesting and were slowly building up to climax and once they reached that point it felt like things were going downhill. I have been losing interest not wanting to phase out to those states.

I actually want to go back to those earlier adventures, those interesting little ones that to me were friends and then the other friend who seemed to be experimenting on physical body. I guess I would like to perceive them again and explore.

I know the issue with the newer experiences is that 'they' know that I'm about to arrive in that other world (which is basically this world in another format) and when I do it often feels like they have been waiting from my last session and it would carry off from that point. In the earlier experiences no beings knew about this, most of the others would often carry a shocked expression. This is why going into the inner worlds have been so difficult since I'm so stuck here with these guys.

I do still go through the death process in those sessions, maybe I'm wrong about the others considering them to be a nuisance since I do recall in a recent experience where the life process here was ending and I stopped it because of that 'there is still so much left to do' feeling which I'm sure all dying people go through.

I know that wherever life is calling me to I need to die before I actually physically die to get there - So I need to decide and act as if my days are numbered (which when I think it about it they actually are). I need to make the necessary arrangements (sorting out wills and last wishes and all that), then leaving behind possessions and all earthly concerns and get to that place because that is the only way I know how to get there, being without a thing not only externally but internally. It is easier to give up all the external things, but the content of the mind is the hardest to let go since it seems to play out all by itself. All my attachments will be let go of one by one (and I have many so this could take years).

Lets just say I'm getting in the role of a dying person, as an example I am a cancer patient and my condition is terminal meaning no hope for survival. So from today slowly slowly I will have nothing left, no possessions of any kind, mental and material. I will be documenting this process as I go along. I do wonder does it really have to be a process, why not let go of all of it in this moment? Will be pondering this question.

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