December 21, 2012

Sleepless Night and a Sexual Awakening

Could not sleep at all last night - I think it was from 4am - still pitch black outside. There was a glimmering star and for a while I stared at it. Eventually by 6am tried to relax and slowly dozed off only to be alerted to a change in my room - a kind of false awakening. Then I lifted up what seemed to be made up legs. They were made up because they were not solid but almost cartoonish and when I imagined them to be lifted up they'd raise up. Same with the arms. Then I felt a presence, it seemed to be hugging me, wrapping itself around me and all of a sudden there was sexual intercourse and I thought perhaps it's an incubus but beyond that I was too aroused. I recall making sounds and saying something then worrying if anyone can hear me.

This has happened before and I do wonder what this other presence is. A creation of the mind? Some say there's a Beloved - and I still question all of that despite having felt it. My mood has been very bad lately and I wonder if that has anything to do with it plus I used Salvia other day perhaps I opened a kind of portal that allowed this energy to be present. There is another thing that occurred from yesterday, if I am quiet and relaxed enough faces form within closed eyes but they are not images in the mind think of it as faces carved within the actual flesh of the eyes - they are a part of what I perceive as the flesh of my body.

1 comment:

Kurt Meyer said...

Hello,read the book 52 sides,only, named E.T.101 in net pdf, googel, than you find the answer!